By Leland Pulley
Periodically I find individuals who have had their share of disappointments and problems. Obstacles were placed in their path. They got a bad deal. They received unfair treatment in an unequal world. Many had to overcame negative circumstances, and some paid the price for wrong decisions. These individuals were roughed up a bit by their experiences and lost some time, but in the end, they got through it. They were able to move beyond such things and get into a winning mode of living. Why? I think it is because they are basically good people, who can move beyond what has happened to them, in order to play in the game of life and win. What do these people have that so many others do not have? There are several factors involved.
First, these individuals are usually intelligent people in more than one way or area. They can see things from more than one perspective. They learn fast. They are open to new ideas, methods, and strategies.
They know themselves well. This includes identifying strengths and weaknesses. They get involved in endeavors that utilize their strengths and not depend much on their weaknesses.
They are confident individuals. They have developed their abilities and know how to use them. They will invest their time, talents, energy, and money into worthwhile things.
They know how to make decisions and will make them. Some good decisions have been made in the past and they are not hesitant to make decisions now or in the future.
They have a desire to learn, grow, develop, and achieve. There is a driving force inside them that propels them forward despite things that get in the way.
They understand that success requires intelligent effort, hard work, and sufficient resources. It does not come easily in most cases. Therefore, they are willing to work hard and consistently over time to be a winner.
They are flexible, which helps them adapt to different people and situations. They are versatile. This allows them to maneuver between obstacles in their way in order to reach their goals and fulfill their aspirations.
They are full of faith and hope. They have vision and can see possibilities for themselves. They are optimistic and will move forward into new areas and endeavors.
As winners, these individuals don=t accept the idea that a person merely has to do his best. This may work for some things in life, but not others. Sometimes your best effort is not good enough, and you must change or improve to actually win or be successful at something.
These individuals are not easily discouraged by problems, delays, or change in plans. They do not let small failures stop them from pursuing major goals or objectives.
They usually have some type of support system or safety net for themselves. This could be people who advise them or help them in some way. It could also be a supply of critical resources like skills or extra money.
They are not frustrated due to lack of opportunities. Instead, they look around and evaluate the situation. Then they go out and make their own opportunities.
They don=t become unhappy, or bitter due to some of their failure. They don=t waste time blaming others either. They are not hardened by all the things they have gone through. Instead, they merely move forward and make progress.
These individuals are realistic, not idealistic. They do not attempt things or expect to accomplish things that are clearly beyond their present abilities and means.
They do their best to see things as they really are and not how they want to see them. Prejudice does not taint good judgment.
They use common sense in assessing, evaluating, and judging. This reduces errors and leads to better decisions that will stand the test of time.
They strive to do things the easy way and best way. This means learning from others and accepting good advice.
At times these individuals are not happy with the way things turn out, but this is life and they accept it. Even winners know they will not always get their way, especially in dealing with others. This is why they will compromise at times to get things done. However, they do not compromise their basic principles and values in the process. Related to this, they will pick their battles selectively. They do not have the means to take on some things or some people, nor too many things at once.
Last, but not least, true winners have spiritual depth in their lives, which supports them in everything they do. It gives them the strength to do what is right. It helps them to set a good example for others. It helps them to choose good endeavors to get involved in. It helps them to serve others, as well as themselves.
In summary, those who win more and lose less do a lot of things right. They combine their inner strengths with things they can obtain from others or their environment which helps them achieve their goals. Each of us can win in some things, and lose in other things. However, to be the type of individual described above, we must figure out how to win more and lose less. This will allow us to move forward on a more consistent basis over the years, despite some of the ups and downs along the way.
Form a mental image in your mind of the type of individual described above. Identify some persons you know who fit this description. What characteristics do they have? How do they live their lives? This will help you to be objective in understanding what I am describing here.
Then take a close look at your life. There are ways for you to transcend any negative circumstances in it and the mistakes you have made. You can rise above these things to become the winner you are capable of being. Find ways to be like the individual in this article. As you do this, you will find that there are many small ways to be a winner. Give yourself credit in all the ways you can. And remember that over you’re your activities, responsibilities, relationships, and goals will change. You will change too. In this process of living your life over the years and decades, keep your head high and do the best you can in as many areas as you can. As you move from young adult years to middle age and then to retirement, you should be content with many of the things that you did right.
I have certainly seen some success and failure in my life. Often not all the things described above were true about several aspects of my life. However, I continually moved on and visualized myself as a winner along the way. In contrast, I have seen over the years individuals who seem to be rich, powerful, or famous for a while. But I can certainly say I do not want to be like a lot of these people who are labeled successful. The primary reason is that if you look closely at how they conduct their lives, they are sacrificing long-term happiness and success for short-term gain. They lack perspective and character. So, do not be dismayed when it seems like the wrong people are getting too much credit and fame. I see this in sports, business, politics, academics, wealth and other ways that success is measured in a worldly way by too many people. I am successful in the most important ways. These include marriage, family life, religion, education, health, etc. Measure your success and how much you are a winner in important ways.
Being a winner is related to the six perspectives stressed on this website. You are your own Inner Boss, you live your life in an Effective manner, you practice good Stewardship, you develop good Character, you seek and achieve Success, and there is a Spiritual dimension to your life that affects everything you think and do.
Key Words – winning, perspective, strengths, confident, decisions, achieve, flexible, optimistic, opportunities, realistic, common sense, learning, compromise, spiritual depth, goals
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